Notify me of new posts via email. An education beyond the classroom: Excelling in the Realm of Horizontal Academics Posted: March 16, Author: tyentwaters Filed under: duke , fuck list , karen owen , power point , ppt , sex list Leave a comment Karen F. Senior Honors Thesis. Duke University. Submitted to the Department of Late-Night Entertainment.
Degree in Tempestuous Frolicing D. May, Share this: Twitter Facebook. Like this: Like Loading Resume Subscription We are delighted that you'd like to resume your subscription. Please click confirm to resume now. Sponsored Offers. Most Popular News. Most Popular Opinion. Most Popular Videos. And he knew how to use his hardware. And the aggression was unbelievable. I was completely unprepared for said encounter as mentioned, I had actually made a serious, and successful, attempt to halt my data collection and behave in a manner more fitting of a responsible adult.
As a result, I felt a little self conscious about my state of affairs, and enjoyed the experience a little less than I would have, had I been completely lacking inhibitions per usual.
My next encounter with said subject was the day before classes started in I walked into Shooters and immediately noticed his rather imposing presence at the bar. Ten minutes later, we were hailing a cab back to his dorm room and I enjoyed a walk of shame and by shame I mean glory past ambitiously academic students the next day.
I drove him back afterwards, as he had an early morning practice to attend. After, we went back to his dorm for rounds 2 and 3 the Gardens was considered, but rejected due to the temperature outdoors. Hooking up on the stairs of the packed library. Trying positions I had never heard of. Being unable to walk time and time again. I assured him that I would be able to help him escape such a potentially painful dilemma.
Even apart from my research, I am similarly inclined, resulting in hookups that were extremely pleasurable and highly educational, daring and exciting, and never, ever boring. In fact, it was best realized when he and his roommate were both sleeping. The degree of synchronization was incredible. As previously mentioned, we left Shooters before I even went inside of the bar—I was craving physical contact that evening, and wanted another specimen or two or three from this aggressive stud.
We got in the cab and went back to West Campus; I should probably say that the cab driver got a money and a show. On the brief journey up we hooked up very briefly; his hands were all over me and I considered pressing the emergency stop button and just going for it there. We got off in the middle of the most packed floor I had ever seen, so I immediately grabbed his hand and made for the nearest exit stairwell, avoiding the stares of millions of students, with both of us laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of it.
It was empty; I led him down a few stairs, but we only made it one level before he grabbed my shoulders, pushed me hard against a wall on the landing, and started kissing me. We were both extremely turned on already, just from the anticipation of illicitly fucking in a crowded library, and both of our hands were in rapid-fire motion, all over each other. One of my favorite things about Subject 3 has always been the creativity and the variation in positions.
Even here in the library stairwell, with my shirt pulled down, my skirt pushed up and the possibility of someone walking in on us an extremely real one, we managed to improvise and appraise different angles and poses. The stairs and railings allowed for positions we had never been able to try before. The lighting was harsh, giving us both the sense that we were starring in a cheap porno indeed, it really was a miracle that nobody walked in on us , which quite frankly added to the eroticism of the entire sequence.
The newness of the location made even the most basic acts such as blow jobs, for example, ten time hotter or so he told me. After we were both exhausted, bruised, drenched, and satisfied, we reclothed and continued down the stairs to head back to his dorm room.
The entire walk back to his dorm was the foreplay for our next hookup he may or may not have had my panties in his pocket. The absurd steamy passion of the last hookup, combined with the anticipation for the next made that the most erotic walk of my life.
Literally the second we entered his room and shut the door our clothes were off and my clothes were torn off and, as popular culture puts it, he morphed into Mr. Flintstone and made that Bedrock. Memorable Moments: I mean, we fucked in a fucking Duke University library during fucking finals week.
Pros: Everything. Cons: None. Subject 4: Jeremy Gould. My second introduction to the baseball team came towards the end of junior year, on a night during which my research, in the interest of scientific accuracy, should probably have been halted. Apparently, Subject 4 and I spoke by the bar and he suggested I go watch porn with him on his large screen television at the Belmont. Also apparently, this suggestion functioned as a grade-A pick-up line for me. He was also at least somewhat aggressive and what I remember was pretty fun.
Subject 5: Stephen Coyle. Much like my assessment of Subject 4, in the name of solid scientific research, my process of data collection should have been halted during my time spent with Subject 5, as I completely blacked out for the first and last time of my academic career. The last thing I am able to recall was standing on the curb outside of Shooters, frantically calling everyone I knew, but to no avail—I was completely alone.
I remember hearing a voice telling me to get into a waiting cab, and I blindly obeyed. I woke up the next day with absolutely no idea as to where I might be. A quick appraisal of my surroundings told me that I was at least on Central Campus aka not in the bed of a local Durhamite. I slowly turned my face towards the still figure prone beside me, dreading what I might see…and almost burst out laughing with relief and amusement. Although I was lying next to someone whom I had never found particularly attractive, I had somehow, in my black out state, still managed to crawl into bed with a Duke athlete.
Furthermore, judging from our unclothed condition it was fairly obvious that we had done more than merely pass out. However, after he woke up shortly after me, I actually stayed, chatted, and watched SportsCenter for almost an hour before walking back to my apartment. I actually amazed myself with how chill and relaxed I managed to be, despite having no recollection of going home with or hooking up with this man.
However, judging from certain strategically positioned bruises which I later discovered in the shower, he was fairly aggressive. And, according to the degree of elevation of the blankets covering his morning happiness, he was also quite sizeable. Subject 6: Alex Hassan. This Subject, baseball number three, was evaluated in late November of Now, I will preface any dialogue by mentioning that I had first noticed said Subject during my freshman year, and had quickly learned his name and sport.
He stood at six feet four inches and possessing a beautiful body and incredible confidence—how could I not notice such a fine specimen of manhood? However, my chances at collecting his data seemed doomed when he was drafted by the Boston Red Sox and exited the university after his junior year. So, you can imagine my delight when he visited Duke and struck up a rather flirtatious conversation at Shooters. His take on dirty talk was intensely amusing. Did you carefully peel back the layers of tissue paper and eagerly shake out its contents, excited beyond belief with the anticipation of seeing your dream gift?
And then did you ever feel your smile plummet to the floor, and had to force every fiber of your being to appear excited as you thanked your grandpa for the single practical pair of coarse, grey wool socks now lying in your lap?
If so, you might be able to appreciate and comprehend my emotions as I seductively eased down his striped boxers to unveil. Was that his dick? But yes. Yes it was. Also he came pretty damn quickly. Subject 7: Jake Lemmerman. My first encounter with this Subject, an individual who was to become among my favorite people at Duke and a source of endless entertainment came in late January, soon after I had decided to stop being a real person.
Ali and I had held one of our infamous, exclusive pregames, and then headed to Shooters. Ali and whipped out blowpops towards the end of the night, and were approached by Seander, Gould, and an individual I did not know, but immediately recognized as good looking. At some point, he stole my lollipop and put it in his own mouth, shooting me a wink in the process. We abandoned the baseball players and left with some Delta Sigs to go back to their section in Edens. Finally, bored with the frat stars, I offered to call him back on her phone he somehow immediately knew it was me and not Ali , and he told us to come over to Belmont ; we called a cab.
The Subject went to the bathroom, leaving me with 4 who had been spitting weak, yet amusing game all evening , who immediately relocated to sit next to me on the couch, where 7 had been sitting.
Luckily, 7 came back soon, 4 went to the bathroom, and I received verbal confirmation that a double team would NOT happen. Needless to say, I did NOT follow. We hooked up, reclothed, and chatted a few minutes waiting for Mike and Ali to come back. His dirty talk his voice is actually incredibly sexy. The randomness of the entire encounter. He is quite well endowed and was really aggressively talented. His hair is incredible. Great sense of humor. Fun, and has its place, but I do prefer longer sessions.
Without me? Come over now. After days of constant sexting, his roommate was finally asleep at a reasonable hour and he texted me to come over. I had anticipated such a moment being awkward, weird, or simply not sexy—I was mistaken. I drove over to his apartment Oregon Apartment H and he was waiting for me at the door. It was an intense quickie, and I honestly felt drunk hormones?
Again, it was extremely entertaining, and I left right after it ended as would become the custom with this subject — neither of us ever spent the night, nor was there any cuddling. It was always simply sexting, sex, and goodbyes, which soon became a routine I anticipated and enjoyed, due especially to the complete lack of clinginess or drama associated with it.
The next few were all drunken hookups, and started with either me or him texting the other some inappropriate jargon. He was the definition of a whore, and the only time he wanted to hook up when we were both out, was when I completely ignored him the entire time and flirted with other guys.
I caught on to this game fairly quickly, and began using it to my own advantage, ignoring him on purpose on evening I wanted to have the option of doing a little more research on him. Once, he called a very unusual move for him at am, as I lay on the futon of Subject 4, his teammate. We sexted for almost 30 minutes that night class, class, class. The last few times we hooked up were all sober, all quickies, and all a lot of fun. I like that. As an individual, however, he entertained me and my friends to the point where I will raise that score to an 8.
Subject 8: Sean Brady. My very first encounter with Subject 8 actually came on Halloween during my sophomore year, at Shooters.
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